Tag Archive | When a White guy thinks about asking you out

Go out and let go of stereotypes

A beautiful Black woman

“I find Black girls very attractive but what I find most attractive is their perspective in life and their inner beauty. Being a White suburban raised male, I was raised to fear the unknown and to stay with like minded people. However after I took the initiative to break out of that shell, I learned that women, especially those who were different than me, had a different view on the world. They also understood my view since my view is seen all the time in the media. This perspective and intelligence has been very attractive to me. It helps balance between my views so that a better truth can be found of myself and the world around me. To those like me interested in dating Black women, relax and be yourself. Forget about stereotypes because once you date as many women as I have, you will learn that each individual regardless of appearance is very different from one another. There are similarities in groups, and then there are differences and uniqueness. Go out and let go of stereotypes and engage your dates with curiosity, innocence, and genuine interest.”

Getting up the courage to approach Black women

A beautiful Black woman

“I’m one of those White guys that stares and smiles at Black girls/women like you. Why don’t (some of us, at least) get up the courage to approach girls/women like you? I suspect that it has something to do with the fact that while we may be attracted to Black girls/women, while we may, indeed, have African American coworkers that we’re on good terms with and while we more than likely daily interact with other Black folk in a variety of other settings, we don’t actually have any African American friends. And in not having those friends, we’re, well, uncertain as to how to approach someone from that group. Afraid, perhaps, that we might say or do something that somehow comes across as stereotyping in nature or otherwise insensitive. Afraid, too, perhaps of being too White (whatever that might be). Those are my ideas, at least. And something that I definitely need to work on, because, quite frankly, I find most of the Black women that I meet these days far more attractive than any others. Enough of my babble…”

The first girl to ever pay attention to me

A beautiful young educated Black woman

“When I first got to high school in 67 it was an urban school. I attended all-white schools since Kindergarten, but everyone went there for high school. It was 60/40 Black/White. I was a shy kid and struck out with White girls – most of whom weren’t very nice to me (it was the sixties and if you weren’t in with the cool crowd you were kept outside. The first girl to ever pay attention to me, and flirted with me was Black. I think I was 14 or 15, and she was very nice, and made me feel worthwhile – I mean she thought I was good looking and talked to me as if I had value as a human being – no White girl ever talked to me like that. I wish I had the courage then to ask her out (as I said I was shy and I didn’t have the wherewithal to buck societal prejudices and my family then (OK I was a coward) – both of which I regret very much today). It took me a few years to work up to dating Black women (by the time I reached my early twenties I was fearless), and for me it always was a far better experience than the White women I dated or was in relationships with over the years – acceptance of me, no judgements, a willingness to share interests. Love is love; I just know for me I want to find my soul mate and I want her to be Black. I’m not sure if I explained this well at all but I felt the need to say something. I hope everyone here meets their true love.”

Haters, Saboteurs, and Cock Blockers Part Deux

Beautifulblackwoman46

@Allie8_79  “…some Black men’s strategy is to talk Black women down to their non-Black friends and generally discourage IRR between BW and non-BM so that they can keep BW for themselves all the while dating out for as long as they can…”
“Oh yeah. There was a young Black woman I liked during high school [mid-70s], and I was good friends with her [male] cousin. I figured, “hey he can put in a good word for me, ensure her folks that I am a straight up guy and come from a good family, etc” As I learned much later, what a mistake. He told me that “she’s just that friendly with everyone so don’t read too much into that. And, I know she’s only interested in Black men because she told me.” What he said was pretty convincing, so I moved on. Fast forward three decades, and at a reunion…the first time we had seen each other since high school. We picked up like it was yesterday. We both wanted to talk about how we felt about each other. I told her how I had felt about her, and she asked why I didn’t pursue her. I told her what her cousin had told me. She was really mad at her cousin [who had died 2 years  earlier], because none of what he told me was true. She said even her dad [no-nonsense US Navy man] liked me, which would have been half the battle. Since we were both there with our spouses, we couldn’t just run out of there, but we thought about it (LOL j/k) I did get to meet her husband, a really nice Cuban guy. So at least she did all right in the relationship department [and he’s probably a better dancer than me too!]”

Black women have the best personalities of all women

A beautiful Black woman deep in thought

“I personally think that WM need to get this stereotype out of their heads because from my experiences BW are very open to IR dating and they love it! I work in a downtown office building and when I’m out and about on my lunch breaks I always see BW checking me out and YES I smile and chat with them even if its only for a few minutes. The stereotype that BW are mean and have attitude is so far from the truth. I have never met a BW who wasn’t engaging, friendly, and personable. BW are beautiful, have a great sense of style & fashion, and they have the best personalities of all women.”

The fear of rejection

A beautiful Black woman out on a date with a handsome White man

“I am White and think Black women are very attractive. Many White guys find Black women sexy. White guys don’t like to feel rejected so they don’t approach a Black lady for fear of rejection. Let a White Guy know you are comfortable around him and are ok with him being White and he will want to date you.”

I am a White guy who loves Black women

A beautiful & elegant Black woman

“I am a White guy who loves Black women.
On the personality level I think Black women are emotionally strong and assertive. They know how to flirt and have fun without being trashy. I have the feeling if a guy has the love of a Black women, she would have his back and would help him be a better man. I think Black women make good mothers, and can be tough when they need to be.
On the physical level I think Black women are absolutely beautiful and truly in a league of their own. Black women are voluptuous, have beautiful faces and smooth skin. They have the best smiles. I think they are comfortable with their bodies and are not afraid to show off their curves. Even older Black women look ageless and youthful. Black women look good even without makeup.
I like the way Black women dress, especially for church, weddings, or special occasions. They look so sexy and elegant.
I think other people get jealous of Black women and put them down.
I think Black women should know there are lots of well-intentioned White men out there looking for dating and marriage.”